POLL: Do you believe in Santa?

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Moderator: MacroQuest Developers

Do you believe in Santa?

Yes
13
39%
No
20
61%
 
Total votes: 33

Grakun
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POLL: Do you believe in Santa?

Post by Grakun » Fri Aug 09, 2002 11:40 pm

Please answer this poll truthfully... Don't say no just to sound cool, or yes just to sound gay...

/anon
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Post by /anon » Sat Aug 10, 2002 12:04 am

I voted no and this is why,

There are approximately two billion children ( persons under 18 ) in the world. However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or Buddhist religions, this reduces the workload for Christmas night to 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per house hold, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at least one good child in each.

Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second --- 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them --- Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).

600,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second crates enormous air resistance --- this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.

Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now

Grakun
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Post by Grakun » Sat Aug 10, 2002 12:23 am

interesting /anon... but Santa is operating in a multi-tasking enviorment... He can do all of the houses simutaiousuly if he wanted....

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L124RD
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Post by L124RD » Sat Aug 10, 2002 1:16 pm

Salutations,
1) um... the bags magical, he reaches in and pulls it the present out... so there is like no weight to it
2) he's magical, how do you explain him getting down the chimneys in the first place
3) santa is skinny, he was made fat by commercialism (shudder)
4) if he has found a way to travel 3000 times the speed of sound in a sleigh, has the capablity to summon items from his workshop out of a bag, make reindeer fly, go down chimneys, and put presents under a tree in a 1/1000th of a second, whats to say he has found a way to make it so he and his reindeer would NOT burst into flame?

Grakun
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Post by Grakun » Wed Aug 14, 2002 6:20 pm

Keep the votes comming!

gingertips
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Post by gingertips » Thu Aug 15, 2002 3:22 am

/Anon - you are a muppet.

I can knock down your argument in one easy sentence.

Santa is magical and so are his reindeers, and so is his sleigh, thats how he can do it all in one night.

You better start being a little nicer or u wont get your stocking filled... :oops:

gingertips
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Post by gingertips » Thu Aug 15, 2002 3:23 am

Oh yeah

And forgot to add - he has a copy of MacroQuest - that makes some of those skills a lot easier... 8)

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Post by Meh » Fri Sep 06, 2002 4:25 am

rofl good one anon 8) i voted no btw

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Post by Ravena666 » Sat Sep 07, 2002 12:04 am

HaY nOw There ARE kids thaT poSt heRe ..
AnD wElL sum of us (me) Still belieave dare is ...

M...O...O...N "That spells Santa"

"YES! Ravena There IS a santa"

Do you know the muffin man?




OMG...WTF.........................BBQ?
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Coraz
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Post by Coraz » Tue Sep 10, 2002 10:19 pm

Guys.. guys... here's the proof

http://www.funked.com/disinformation/indexnew.htm#

Transmission #1.2

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L124RD
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Post by L124RD » Wed Sep 11, 2002 8:25 am

Salutations,
thats fake! we all know he is a brain-meat eating robot who leaves his frozen kingdom once a year to terrorize everyone then the US government shoots him down and replaces all his '... presents... yea...' with 'PRESENTS' and then the day is saved. but... in case you where wonedering, it was the US gov who turned him into an _evil_ robot in the first place, since he did used to be a kind, good hearted old man, created in a lab in the basement of a coca-cola pepsi-cola factory.

gingertips
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Post by gingertips » Wed Sep 11, 2002 9:22 am

u need help liz - u really do...

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L124RD
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Post by L124RD » Wed Sep 11, 2002 9:23 pm

Salutations,
I feel so loved... aw... *huggles everyone who visits this post until they explode*

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rizwank
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Post by rizwank » Thu Sep 12, 2002 12:11 am

sigh waste of space ;p

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Ravena666
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Post by Ravena666 » Thu Sep 12, 2002 12:38 am

L124rd .... you hurt me just now.......
you really hurt me :cry:
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